He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in nine holes before he had to head home. Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man as he was golfing alone. Not being able to say no, he allowed the old gent to join him. To his surprise the old man played fairly quickly. He didn't hit the ball far, but plodded along consistently and didn't waste much time. Finally, they reached the 9th fairway and the young man found himself with a tough shot. There was a large pine tree right in front of his ball - and directly between his ball and the green. After several minutes of debating how to hit the shot the old man finally said, "You know, when I was your age I'd hit the ball right over that tree." With that challenge placed before him, the youngster swung hard, hit the ball up, right smack into the top of the tree trunk and it thudded back on the ground not a foot from where it had originally lay. The old man offered one more comment, "Of course, when I was your age that pine tree was only three feet tall."
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I saw this asshole in my bathroom after I got out of the shower, I need to stop brushing my hair in the mirror.
To skynosaurs
An investigator.
Doctor: Congratulations, now you have the kidney stone
No one is willing to start an ad venture.
I heard there was a brazilian...
In doing so, I unwittingly discovered a little known fact: Did you know that Hellman's Mayonnaise originated in England? The U.S., Canada and Mexico received regular shipments from abroad. Aboard the doomed Titanic were 12,000 cases of the cholesterol-laden stuff destined for Mexico, its port-of-call following New York. When it didn't make its destination, thousands of Mexicans were without the condiment that had become a passion. And, that was the source of the very first Sinko de Mayo.
In Mexi-Cans.
Add a "g" and it's gone
This, of course, was devastating for them because May 5th is one of their busiest days of the year. But instead of closing, they decided to work with it-and held a Sink Hole de Mayo celebration.
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